Friday, May 8, 2015

We're Ready to Order!

Whenever a customer tells me that they're ready to order, it usually means that they need another 15 minutes to decide what the hell they want.  I can understand being indecisive and having a hard time trying to decide between one or two things, but some people act like they're picking a college.  (thanks Lou Santini.)

And then guests will ask me what I like.  I tell them three items that I really enjoy on the menu.  Then they ask me about something I didn't mention.  I tell them it's not in my top three.  Now I'm somehow in an argument about why I didn't mention EVERYTHING on the menu.

Here's how a conversation went with a table the other night:

Customer:  "We're ready to order."

Me:  "What may I get for you?"

Customer IMMEDIATELY looks back at the menu and says nothing for 2 minutes.

Me:  "I'll give you another moment."

Customer:  "That's not necessary.  I told you that we're ready to order!"

Me:  "Please.  What may I get for you."

Customer:  "Don't start with me.  Go to somebody else."

Me:  "I can't start with somebody else.  You're the only one at the table."

Until next time... Server's don't pay their rent with compliments.

"Bitter.  Party of 1?  Your table is ready."









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