The Bitter Bistro

My buddy Lou Santini says that when you "say the word 'boob,' you can't help but to smile."  Well, when you see one pop out of a woman's dress sitting in your section at a restaurant, you can't help but giggle your ass off. That's right.  An unintentional, non-breast feeding, in-your-face boob popped out to say "hello," and I was there to wave "hello" back.  But let's not rush into this.  I am still under fire from co-workers about what should have been said during the ordeal, so let me present all of the evidence, and let you guys pass down judgement. A husband and wife are seated in my section.  I heard some sort of accent, so I think that they are European.  The husband is looking at the cocktail menu as I approach the table to greet them. "Welcome.  How are you doing this evening?"  I said. "Hello."  The husband muttered.  "I want champagne.  What would you recommend?" At this point, ...

Many of you have asked me to blog more often about the things that people do in restaurants and bars.  I try to write about what happens as much as I can, but sometimes, I am so shocked about some of the things that I see and hear, it takes awhile for me to digest it all, and transcribe it to you.  Now that I've finished digesting, here you go... I've noticed in many fine dining establishments, that to cleanse the palate in-between courses, they will bring you a scoop of sorbet.  It's refreshing and gets your taste buds ready for the next course.  Here in Los Angeles, some customers have a better way of cleansing their palates... by jamming their tongues down the throats of their dinner guests.  And why not?  Don't birds do the same thing?  One evening, I had a table of three people, one guy and two girls, who were eating on the patio at the restaurant I was working.  To say they were having a good time is an understatement.  I went out ...