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Showing posts from September, 2014

The Fate of a Yelper

I have been cyber threatened!  Weapons and insults are a thing of the past.  Customers nowadays prefer to be cowards and use their Yelp profiles to get what they want in restaurants.  To quote "Cassius" from Julius Caesar:

Cassius:
Why, man, he [Caesar] doth bestride the narrow world
Like a colossus, and we petty men
Walk under his huge legs, and peep about
To find ourselves dishonorable graves.
Men at some time are masters of their fates;
The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars,
But in ourselves, that we are underlings.
Julius Caesar Act 1, scene 2, 135–141

Accept your own fate, Yelpers.  I can no longer be slain with your petty words.  In fact, your words fuel my blogs and podcasts.  Just like this man and woman I had sitting in my section the other night.
Just to let anybody know, if I greet the table and you start out our conversation by saying, "We are going to start out with the Tuna Carpaccio, and then decide on everything else," I am going to put in the …

You Got Yelped!!!

Meet M S from Los Angeles, CA.  A woman, who in typical Yelper-cowardly fashion, has hidden her face in her profile pic because she doesn't want the world to know what she looks like when she writes pointless reviews on Yelp.

What makes this review even more repulsive than most is the fact that she blames the restaurant for her allergy.  Another person who failed to disclose important information that could've possibly killed her, and now it's the restaurant's fault.

The Bitter Bistro Podcast 219 w/RuthAnn Thompson

Meet RuthAnn Thompson.  A sweet girl with a great smile, but you piss her off, she'll spit fireballs at you and beat you with the bar mat.


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 Until next time... Server's don't pay their rent with compliments.

"Bitter.  Party of 1?  Your table is ready."










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THE BITTER BISTRO

Run Lesbian! RUN.

This is the year of the con artist.  I cannot tell you how many times I have had people come into my restaurant, drink and eat, and then claim they don't have any money on them to pay.  What year is this?

The latest person to attempt this heist is definitely my favorite to date.  She's a short, butch, acerbic-Lesbian, who wore "Tom Cruise" Ray Bans, and a black ball cap that was tilted to the side.  And didn't have a problem telling me she's a Lesbian, or whatever else was on her mind.  Now before any Lesbians take offense to me using the L-word, I'm just trying to paint the picture.  I have members of my family and friends who are Lesbians, and I have no problem saying that they can throw a football farther than me, and also take me to the hoop.  (SIGH.)

She sat on the patio and started out by having a couple of glasses of wine, saying that she was going to be meeting with somebody in a couple of hours.  Her friend arrives, (a woman,) and she decides to…