Thursday, June 6, 2013

Check Your Coat Before You Wreck Your Coat


Restaurants nowadays have been streamlined and simplified as far as decor and cuisine, but some things that we used to have are now no longer, like the coat check.  Another one of my favorite bloggers, The Bitchy Waiter, also wrote something similar to this, Does Anyone Still Wear A Hat?, and the answer--sadly--to all of these questions is quite simply, no!

When I think of a coat-check girl, I think of that scene from The Devil Wears Prada where Meryl Streep keeps dumping her coats and bags on the desk of the "new girl," like she was some hallway closet that never gets cleaned out.  I am certain some dining establishments still employ such girls, (any maybe even guys,) but they have quickly died out like Lindsey Lohan's career.  Too soon?

"Can you check mine and my wife's coat for me? a gentleman asked me one night.

"Unfortunately, we don't have a coat-check sir," I replied.

"Why not?"

Because it's not New York's Russian Tea Room , circa 1987!  "We just don't have a need for one here at this restaurant, in Los Angeles sir."  I said.

"Then perhaps you can just find a place for our coats.  And then find our waiter.  We're thirsty!"

"I'll take care of your coats.  And I am your waiter."  I quickly left and discarded of the coats in our make-shift coatroom that we use when we occasionally get this type of request.  It usually involves putting the coats over some chairs, and leaving them in some office, or up by the host stand, or stuffed into some cubby hole.



Then I returned to take their drink order.  "What can I get you to drink?"

"Aren't you going to give us a claim ticket?  So you know which one is our's," the gentleman cried.

"No claim numbers sir.  You have the only coats in the restaurant tonight.  But if you'd like, you can describe your coats to me before I go to get them."  Now I know how my dry cleaner feels.

Until next time... Server's don't pay their rent with compliments.

"Bitter.  Party of 1?  Your table is ready."

The Bitter Bistro

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