People Who Need People

It sounds harsh, but after dealing with people yelling at you that their steak is overcooked, undercooked, still in the form of a cow, I kind of have a hard time dealing with people's antics on a day-to-day basis, and that is probably also the reason why many places offer their employees a "shift drink," (an alcoholic beverage for free at the end of their shift,) to try to soothe and pacify what had just happened to that server or bartender during their shift.

As Josh hilariously said on the podcast, "I can't even like my grandparents now, because they remind me of some of the customers."

Seeing all of the horrible things that have been happening in our country with people going "postal" on other people, I would not be surprised if the next person to go "postal" is a server. I just had a customer the other day flip out on me because we couldn't get his salad out to him fast enough."

"Where's my salad? My friends have already started eating their lunch, and I still don't have my f@*king salad!" He barked.

"I apologize about the wait sir, but your salad accidentally went to another table, so we had to remake yours. It will be out shortly," I calmly said. Like it was my problem that he had rude friends who don't wait to start eating until EVERYBODY had their food.

"If I don't get my f@*king salad, then you're going to have to take it off my f@*king bill!!!" He continued his rant.

"Of course. I understand. But you'll get your salad."

I then went back to the kitchen to make the chef make the salad faster by staring at him. Which is standard procedure to make food come out quicker. While I was waiting for the infamous "f@*king salad," both of my co-workers came back to tell me that they were accosted by this man the same way that I was.

"Just tell him to get bent," I told them. Which means his food is up in server talk.

And sure enough, I brought the man his salad, he ate it, I check back with him, he grunted, "It's fine!" and no blood was shed... yet.

Until next time... Server's don't pay their rent with compliments.

"Bitter. Party of one? Your table is ready."

The Bitter Bistro

Comments

Excuse Tips

It's ideal for a server to receive 18 to 20 percent gratuity for a job well done. Now it seems that customers are looking to leave an excuse rather than a monetary tip explaining why they couldn't leave their server any money. WTF?!! Of course, because my landlord would love to receive an excuse instead of a check for rent this month. "I don't have the money for rent, because I'm a writer/comedian. But I adore this building. So secure." The above picture was found on Yahoo.com . One of the comments said that they thought this was an altered pic, but I have actually seen this happen to myself and co-workers. And by-the-way, what if the server waiting on the woman was a single parent? So the lady who wrote this has now started a domino effect on their server who is struggling to make ends meet. And so on, and so on... Get bent! I don't believe in saying that if you can't afford to go out, that you should never go out. T...

10 Ways To Get Better Service At A Restaurant

I have noticed that there are many variables that can lead to a bad dining experience, and for the customer to say that they received "poor service" has become cliche, and just the "go to" for when all things go bad in a restaurant. Here is a Top 10 list to help customers have a positive experience the next time they dine out. 10. SIT AT THE FIRST TABLE THE HOST GIVES YOU "This table's too round. This table's too brown. This table's just right." You are not buying real estate. So for you to pass on the first, then the second, and even the third table option the host gives you is beyond ridiculous. The tables are all made the same, have four legs, four chairs, (if applicable,) and are strong enough to hold food, drinks, and purses. And if you pass on a table, now you've messed up the floor plan that the host has prepared at the beginning of their shift, and everybody in the restaurant takes notice as you are aimlessly walking a...

You Got Yelped!!!

As my quest to take down Yelp.com continues, I found another Yelper who continually pushes the boundaries of common decency, and deserves to be outed. So here I go: Meet Ben P . Or, excuse me, Ben "Benitos" P. (Whatever the hell that means!) He seemed to have found his way into Beverly Hills and expected the red carpet to be rolled out for him because he thinks that he is somebody. Actually, he claims to be a(n) "Iron Yelper America," as it says on his Yelp profile. When in actuality, Ben is no more than one of the many disillusioned Yelpers who probably should've gotten his ass kicked a bit more on the playground when he was a kid. (Again, I don't condone violence, but there is something to be said for somebody FINALLY learning their lesson.) Wow I knew going in this place was not going to be good. Right from the start? How have you made this far in life, Ben? That should've been the moment for you to turn around and leave. ...

The Bitter Bistro

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